Tuesday, October 4
Day 274: Items Purchased:0, Temptation Radar:0
Photography. Something about the artistry of capturing raw emotion and preserving it arrests my heart, perhaps more so than any single image. I’ve always been captivated by the beauty of the art. In fact, during one rather short-lived period of my life, I played photographer. Imagining that I had a unique gifting, I decided to venture out into the world of photography business, soon realizing that I’d waded into waters far too deep for me. Shortly thereafter, I realized that desire and vision need not always translate into a business venture, and that sometimes its discovery serves only the purpose of aiding your own emotional rescue. My true gift, mistakenly interpreted by me as the ability to record magical images, was really only revealed to me through them, that being: I just love people.
I’m learning this year that it’s okay to love people from afar. Many days, friends, co-workers or folks I’ve encountered day in and day out will flash before my eyes. At the very thought of them, I’ll begin re-play conversations in my mind, picturing their expression…the emotion I felt in the discussion. Those pictures, the mental ones, are what prompt prayer for and a yearning to love more. I’ve learned this year that I’m more of an introvert than I recognized. I’m a one-on-one person, reticent at a party….nervous in a spotlight. Being behind a camera is much easier than being in front of it. I’m learning that this is quite alright.
Today, as I pen this, several pictures replay in my mind. I flash to a visit over coffee with a high school classmate who has experienced an unfathomable series of personal tragedy, and it was the first time I’ve seen her since 1995. And, people think Facebook is a empty waste of time? I visited my friend who is expecting her first baby. She showed me her nursery and I lost my breath, not because of the grandeur of it-and believe me it’s grand- but because of her hope being realized, the road we’ve traveled, the treasure she is. My heart can hardly contain it. Again, I’m thinking of text messages sent back and forth like rapid fire between me and yet another dear one. Why were the text messages so special? Because they were being sent from the labor and delivery room. She, birthing first baby, kept me abreast with updates, while I sent encouragement and of course, a funny picture, via text message. Why all the texting? Sometimes it’s the only way.
What a week it’s been so far. How rich. How full. How meaningful. And yet, I still come home to my very favorite pictures: family. The image of Olivia currently engrained in my imagination is one of her singing “Someday My Prince Will Come”, and twirling about. This time, I captured it.