Who’s On The Tightrope Now?

Day 61:  Items Purchased, 0   Temptation Radar: 9

The circus is such an interesting place. People come from all over to see crazy animals, acrobats and clowns engage in the most unusual and nearly impossible stunts. It’s as if the freakish participants of known phenomena come together to mesmerize the crowd. I always liked the circus because it was a place where, in my view, even the most random people could be heroes. Although, one part of the 3 ring show always made me cringe. With palms anxiously cupped over 2 little eyes, I’d peek through the crack between my fingers to watch the tightrope walker. All the while, my brain would be screaming, “why would anyone do that!? What if the net breaks? What if they can’t make it across the to the other side?” I could hardly take it.

Last evening, I had the strangest dream. My family was at the circus. Front & Center. I could see them. Why was I not sitting with them? Just as I glanced over, a bright spotlight blinded me. Looking down, I gasped. Oh My Lord. I was on the tightrope. Yep. Me. Dressed in a gold glittered Robert Rodriguez Sheath, wearing oversized sunglasses and clutching a pair of Choo’s stilettos, cringing at the sight of the yards of  wire ahead. Far ahead, I could see a large, square gift, wrapped delicately in gorgeous teal damask paper with a huge citrine sparkling bow and a card that had my name on it. Someone announced my name and I felt a lump in my throat, and stomach pain. The light shined on the present while the drums rolled. I placed one foot out on the wire, overwhelmed with curiosity about the package. Suddenly, with a little stumble, I dropped one of the shoes. Completely panicked, I looked down, realizing I could see neither the shoe or the net. When my eyes returned to the rope, i took another shaky stride, irritated that I was on this rope in the first place, sick over the shoe, yet determined to get that box. ugh. Could somebody stop the drumming? 3 more steps…. again, I stumbled, but this time jolted me awake.

It’s official. Shopfast has plunged me into the sea of scary repressed dreams about the circus and now I’m on the tightrope of challenge. This week, I’ve shopped 4 times, purchasing nothing, except for some makeup. Funny thing is, most of these trips have been with and for other people, and all rather impromptu. Saturday, I helped a dear friend who’s expecting a baby select a few outfits for the home stretch of her pregnancy. Honestly, for a moment I wanted to be preggo just to have a legitimate excuse to break this fast and buy something. Then, Tuesday afternoon, I began receiving these strange text pics of a lovely lady in a variety of adorable dresses.  As it turns out, a friend of mine had an event for which she needed a dress, and also being 9 months postpartum, she needed some items in general. She was texting me for opinions and advice. Being frustrated with the digital quality of my cracked blackberry, I did as any good friend would in a 911 situation. I rushed over to the local boutique and helped her make some selections. In about 45 minutes, she was stylistically prepared for her event, and I was fashionably late for an appointment.  Finally, another call summoned me into an extraordinary shop scenario. A friend who’s been on the hunt for the ultimate chic pair of sunshades.  I, fully understanding the importance of selecting fabulous glass, felt another needed consultation! As you can see, I’ve been activated in the role of shopping consultant.  People love to feel comfortable with the merchandise they buy and having another’s opinion just helps. I can’t adequately explain the excitement I felt when we found the perfect outfits and the perfect sunglasses for these ladies. It was though I getting a present.

Recollection of the coincidental orchestration of these events this morning enabled me to readily interpret the dream. I’m on the tightrope, alright. The retail tightrope. It’s painfully difficult, knowing I’m only 1 small purchase away from failing. I have noticed, however, that my resolve is getting stronger. Temptation is always present, but the joy I find in helping my friends makes up for any little bit of sadness I might feel walking away from a new dress or a fun skirt. Seeing them sigh with relief when they find exactly what they are looking makes me smile.

For 304 more days, I shall inch along the tightrope of my promise trusting that new discoveries will continue to surprise me. The lessons I learn from a funny little project on shopping remain the ultimate gift.


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