Day 54: Items Purchased: 0, Temptation Radar:0
Finally. Tuesday night, day 54 and I’m caught up with posting. I’ve been avoiding the inevitable, but now, it’s fess-up time. I did it this time….really blew it. Did I break my shopfast rules? Nope. For those who may be snickering at my potential failure, don’t pop the champagne bottle just yet. I’m still going strong. However, as I suspected early on regarding discovery of new things on this project, another issue has presented itself through a “poor choice”, if I may use kid-speak, that I made. As promised, I’m airing my smelly stillettos for all to see, because I really stepped in it this time.
Discovery: My shopping addiction is not limited to clothing.
Confession: I spent the childrens’ preschool tuition on pretty pillows & a bowl.
Sigh. Big Sigh. Knowing myself, and realizing a bit about addictive behaviors, I also recognized some startling warning signs when I snuck into my favorite local home decor shoppe ( for the 4th time in 10 days) to take care of some “unfinished business”‘ (clearing throat). After settling my affairs, distracted by a beautiful display, I found myself grabbing up blue canton saucers and knick-knacks like a starving bull at the bar-b-que pit. Choked by the reality of what was happening, I took pause to admit the reveal of a new problem area: Substitution Shopping.
You see, our recent home “fluffing” project evoked much satisfaction and a night&day-like aesthetic difference. Similarly portrayed on most home improvement shows, people look forward to the great “reveal” right? Me too. However, my reveal exposed far more than new bedding, carpet and a few accessories. I had to admit that home decor could become stumbling block to breaking free of shopping addiction. When I began the shop fast, it seemed like clothing obsession had taken huge priority, certainly the primary point of conflict. I mean, c’mon…I really thought Ann Taylor would take personal offense to my sabaticle? As if we are personal friends? Um….this could be defined as some sort of clinical weirdness, I’m sure. Permission to purchase home goods could very well be a suitable substitute to fine fashion purchases. I wrestled with this despite the affirmation from friends and family that it was okay. What I didn’t share is that I re-allocated necessary resources for fluff. Not such a good idea, I reckon. Of course I understand that nobody else would EVER do such a thing. 😉 Nevertheless, if I’m just going to obessess over my house like I do the shopping mall, what’ve I really accomplished?
Understanding the potential danger of this scenario, painstakingly, I must amend the ShopFast constitution. With stammering lips and shaky hands, I declare prohibition of home accessory purchases, save a candle, during the remainder of the year.